I'm sorry, I love astrology...plus it's been trying to tell me something for some time.

I have been into astrology for a while.
But lately I have been nose-in-book, bordering-on-obsession into it.
I don’t know if I believe that everything is already planned for you.
But it has really helped me to get through the breakup by thinking that everything happens for a reason and to know that this all happened so that I could move on to a bigger step in my life.
And so that I may grow and become better as a person.
I don’t believe in God, which a lot of astrologers do.
But still I am fascinated by what I have been reading about myself lately.

I highly recommend this site.
I read it every day.

www.astro.com

I have mentioned to some before that back in October I took Mr. 9 to a psychic for his birthday (Libra) and here’s the major thing that stuck out.

Psychic – In April something major is going to happen that will change your whole life. It will be completely unexpected and you will never see it coming. But, once it happens your whole life will open up.

Now the way she explained it, I got the feeling that she was talking about my career.
Maybe that’s just cause I am always thinking about it.
But, I was getting excited to see what April would bring.
Maybe I’d finally get hired to Second City after 7 auditions and get to quit my day job,
Or land one of the million pilots I had auditioned for through my agent and get to move to LA on someone else’s dime…
You know something along this line.

Well, on the same day in April (as previously discussed) a good friend died and my boyfriend of 9 years broke up with me.
This really shook me.
And maybe it’s coincidence…
Maybe.

Well, here are some other things from astro.com that I can’t shake:

- This will be a time of great toughening up for you.

- There may be changes in your life at this time, and your relationships may be considerably altered, but this is only so that you may experience a regeneration that will keep your life from becoming stale and dead.

(I like this one a lot and it makes me feel strong)

- End of December 2005 until beginning of September 2006: This is a time of surprises and sudden opportunities. And you will strive now for a kind of freedom you have never known before. You will seek in every way to express what it means to be young and free.

(I certainly want to be young and free!)

- Whatever the effects of this influence, you can expect a sudden broadening of the scope of your life and the opportunity to encounter life from a new, richer and broader perspective. This may come about through a major transforming event or through a series of minor ones that collectively have a large impact.

(My horoscope keeps telling me that this is a time of gaining greater freedom and personal growth. That’s pretty cool, and I keep this in mind when I ponder all I have lost.)

- Last year, many aspects of your life have begun to change. Relationships have changed or ended, and you may have changed your residence or your job;

(True and true)

- You have been dominated by an urgent feeling that if you don't do everything you have always wanted to do or felt that you should, you will never have another chance. And now, at about twenty-nine, you will feel that a substantial portion of your life has passed and that you had better get on with making it all work. If your marriage or love relationship is unsatisfactory but you have been making the best of it, you will examine that relationship even more thoroughly now and may decide to end it. Certainly you will have to change it substantially. The same is true of any other aspect of your life that you have tolerated but not found very rewarding.

(I feel like they are telling me to quit my job and move to LA….hmmm)

- You may experience a sense of loss for the elements of your life that are coming to an end now. However, do not dwell upon these losses, for they are necessary in order to clear the decks for the major period of action in your life.

(See what I mean? Doesn’t this make you feel tough and ready?)

- This is a time of endings and new beginnings.

(Pretty much)

So, you know… it’s kind of weird.
I romanticize about the stars and what they can do to people.
In Montana you can see EVERY star, I feel really safe when I am there.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~’

This website also has a lot to say about my sex life,
Sex can break a relationship and I fear it helped to break mine with Mr. 9.
Sometimes you can’t be scared.
Sometimes you have to give up and jump in.
Even if it makes you blush.
It made him blush sometimes.
I feel bad I didn’t protect him better, instead of making judgments.
Instead of stewing.
I didn’t give him the honesty he deserved.
But he didn’t give it to me either.
We lost the fun sex should be.
And by the way, sex should be fun.
Sex should be fun and exciting and you should have a boner just thinking about it the whole next day after it happened.
Mr. 9 lost his boner for me and had to start looking for it somewhere else.
Ho hum, it happens. I’m not perfect.

From www.astro.com.
I consider all of these things to be true about myself.
I find it weird that a computer website can tell me these things since very few other people know them to be true.
This is why I love astrology.
It’s a mystery that you can attempt to harness and use for the forces of good and not evil.

- The ideal partner for you would be someone who enjoys sexual variety, someone who can introduce you to new and exciting forms of lovemaking.

- Unlike some others, you seldom fall into the trap of jealousy, for you value your lover's feelings about you more than technical chastity or faithfulness. For this reason, you are one of the most easy-going partners a person could have.

- Similarly, the highest values you seek in a lover are faithfulness and loyalty, qualities you are most willing to demonstrate once you have chosen the person you feel is just right for you.

- Once you have gained experience in love, you can be a very considerate and thoughtful lover, who as both teacher and lover can gently initiate a younger person in the ways of love. In that case, it may be difficult for your lover to make the transition from student to equal, but that must happen if you intend to have a long-term relationship.

- Love at its best is a happy, sometimes complicated game of constantly changing stimuli, but underlying it is a much simpler emotional base of mutual friendship and companionship.

- Love talk and a verbally affectionate lover may be particularly important to you. Compliments and sweet nothings whispered in the ear, as well as dialogue during lovemaking constitute a significant area of sexual enjoyment. You should find a lover who is equally knowledgeable about sex and willing to put that knowledge to good use. Your partner should be quite communicative and willing to discuss lovemaking with you.

- Because you approach sex in a very open, almost playful way, it does not have the pitfalls it has for so many people in our rather repressed culture.

- You are most comfortable with someone who is as sunny and pleasant as yourself.

(Yay! I'm pleasant!)