Girls, Girls, Girls or "New Dicks in 2006!"

(Clarkies at zoo)















Since the breakup certain things have become very important to me.
One of them is the female relationships I have in my life.
I cannot explain the calm it has brought me to connect with the women I respect,
but it has been through these friendships that I have found the courage to gain back my own power.

This weekend Venus came in From New Hampshire.
She is woman in full bloom.
She is earthly love and goddess in Greek body and open heart.
Venus is my deepest emotional sister and favorite bosom friend.
In college we often butted heads, but only because we are both bulls and have such stubborn pride.

After the breakup, I would call her at random times to cry.
She’s very good at cooing into the phone in a soft belly voice that makes you feel like you are being cradled in her arms.
Her understanding is complete.
Her sympathy, warm and yummy.
So she flew out to see me.
Just to see me.
And our other Clark friends…. but mostly me.

When she was staying in my studio apartment it felt like home.
We talked about sex and babies, and bodies, and boys and sex, and friends, and love and sex, and home, and sex and dreams.
There is not a thing about me she does not know.
I love her in a way that I imagine two spirits love each other who have left their bodies behind and moved into the ethos so they can pass through one another.

When Venus comes to town I get to see The Bastard.
And as three girls who lived together in college we are a terrible table to sit next to at dinner.
We got Tripwire to come out for noodles.
I am trying to seduce Tripwire into deep routed friendship and the fact that she came out with us made me happy, happy, happy.
After two bottles of wine:

Bastard- (Talking in her drunk voice which is also her yelling voice.) So, then when I said female ejaculation was a myth my boyfriend shook his head “No”. Apparently he dated a girl in college who shot in a stream.

Tripwire shoves her face into her armpit. She is choking on her laughter.
Venus is holding her stomach and her forehead is on the table.
I have tears coming down my face and my tongue feels swole with loud gags that are the phase one step beyond laughter.
There is a family sitting behind us who keep glaring at us like they wish we would just die and I want to feel sorry about our conversation but I can’t stop laughing long enough to become embarrassed. The fact that the waiter is scared of us makes everything even funnier.

To hear these women laugh is to become elated.
We laughed a lot.
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We went to the zoo and lost ourselves in the monkey house.
Me - Oh my God! That monkey's got a heart shaped butt.
Venus - It's beautiful.
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The night before we ate sushi at a restaurant where I am in love with one of the waitresses.
I’ve had her as a server twice.
This waitress is voluptuous and exotic in a way that makes you want to lie on her belly in silk sheets.
Bastard, Venus and I wrote her a love letter on blue paper and ran out of the place giggling like 6th graders.
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There is a website that sells clothing through short porno movies.
www.sexpackaging.com.
We girls kneeled around my laptop to gawk at what was happening on the screen.
You can choose to watch: boy on girl, boy on boy, or girl on girl.

Me – I’m sorry, two hot boys making out is hot. It’s crazy hot. I’m afraid I’m gonna get too excited.

Bastard – I think it’s great that they sell clothes like this. I mean we might as well just remove the innuendo and get to the point already.

Tripwire – Two cute boys…yeah.

Venus – Look at those women. It’s not really sexy cause it doesn’t seem like their into each other. It’s more just a show for the guys.

Me – Where are the clothes that they're selling?

Venus – Exactly.

The movie pans in for a close up on "the goods" and we all fall over in screaming giggles.
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With Venus in town the Clarkies come out of hiding.
Another Clarkie, Big Red had also flown in from NYC.
Big Red is doing comedy there and he is very fun and cute as a button.
So the reunion was grand and inclusive.
I had a small party in my new digs to celebrate our family.
We drank pina coladas on my back deck and shot shit for miles.
The laughter rose into the night on louder and louder bursts.

A Chicago friend, Dark Yellow who fits into the Clarkie clan like someone who went to school with us, has also recently had his heart broken by a long time love.

Me – We have to have a motto to ring in the New Year.
Dark Yellow – Well the New Year was like 6 months ago.

Me – No, no. The new year is now. It’s come with the summer. The breakups have to be a part of last year so we can move on. My tentative motto is “2006, deal with it.” Or “2006, no regrets”
Dark Yellow – You know what your motto should be? “New dicks in 2006!”

Me – Done and done!

Then we tried to find a good one for him, but the best we had was “Give me a badge for my new vag”. We’re still working on it.

Venus left me this morning and I can still feel the heat of her body in my apartment.
I am healed through laughter. I am healed through love.
Thank you wahine.
Mahalo, Mahalo, mahalo.